But I've been thinking a lot lately - about how I get winded easily, feel lethargic and stressed, and a need for an outlet and to feel healthier than I have since I played sports in high school. How when I get my kids back they're going to need me to be able to keep up with them (hyper butts as they are) and be in their lives as long as possible as a positive role model. Some news I received recently sealed the deal.
Last Monday I had blood drawn to have my Vitamin D level tested. Today I received the results. For a person over the age of 18 optimal Vitamin D level is between 30 and 80, and anything under 20 is considered a deficiency. My level is 17. Even though I was told throughout my pregnancy that my baby and I were both healthy and fine, Julian and I were both severely deficient at the time of his birth. The doctor who provided us with the report on Julian's bone problems told me then that I had several risk factors of being deficient as well, including my fair skin and obesity, which is why I got tested in the first place. And like I said, that was it.
I've been working on losing weight and becoming healthier for a couple of weeks now, and it's already starting to pay off. I've lost about five pounds, I already feel less stressed and more healthy, and I've noticed I don't need a nap during the day to get through it with the energy I need to get things done. I own a couple of exercise videos and I go out of my way to climb stairs at school. I'm also on 1000mg Vitamin D twice a day (yes, that's a full 1600mg more than normal people need). I'm determined not to let this crap happen again, and to do everything in my power to make sure Julian and my bones are strong and healthy like they should be.
I'm not doing this for my husband - he has never criticized me for my weight and his support so far has been invaluable to me. I'm not doing this to be stick thin or for society to like me better. For those of you who know me well you know I've never given a damn about what anyone thinks of me. I've decided to do this for me but most of all for my beautiful children, biological and step, who deserve my full effort and health to enjoy life with them as they grow, laugh and live.
I'm hoping that by putting myself and my goals out there I will be more accountable to myself. I feel good about this, and I welcome any positive support from my wonderful friends and family who have always been so great to me. If you have nothing but negatives, however, please keep it to yourself. I have no room for negative and drama-filled people in my life.
Oh, and I will be trying to update my blog more often when I weigh in and stuff, to keep my progress recorded and hopefully keep up the support and encouragement I know I'll get throughout my journey.
